Yesterday afternoon was spent on the computer setting up and publishing the first blogs. By dusk, Max, my small dog, jumped up on my lap. He’d been well behaved, quiet for hours and wanted some attention. I took him on his very long lead up the hill to the bushland at the back of our property. Just inside the entrance, in the middle of the path, there lay a beautiful cockatoo feather. Not just any feather, it was huge, about 9 inches long. (that is longer than the black shoe box!)
I got a strong intuitive hit that it was a sign. A gift from the universe, to say i was on the right path. You might think, it could have been any old random feather just sitting there. Perhaps it was. But it meant something to me. This feather was massive, sitting right in the middle of the path where many walkers come and go. I always seem to come across cockatoo feathers at significant times and I’d never seen one this big. I also get strong body sensations, pins and needles and other energetic signs when something bigger is happening.
I asked for permission to take the feather and waited for a response. Yes it was there for me to find. I picked it up, and as i walked on i pondered – how do i know when i’m on the right path? Is there a right path? If there is, it certainly doesn’t appear linear. Sometimes, i don’t know that i’m actually on the right path, but i always seem to know when i’m off it.
Image from marybeasullivan.com
Being on the path or being in flow, can bring a feeling of quiet knowing, rarely are there the big lightning bolts or significant signs (but sometimes there are), but my intuition or my body always lets me know if i’ve strayed, if something isn’t right for me. Often it screams at me. I’ve become better at listening and trusting this inner voice.
So the evening was uneventful and i went to bed, settling in, then it hit me. A panic attack. A total adrenaline rush, freak out, oh my god, what have i done?? I’ve told the world (or anyone kind enough to listen), that i’ve seen fairies and other spiritual stuff! OMG! OMG! OMG! (oh my god!!)
The scream by Munch from travel.usatoday.com
Now I’ve been blessed during my lifetime to have found many like minded souls, especially in the last few years through my spiritual mentor, Nicole. This is my tribe, other beautiful souls who are spiritual, who work with crystals, spend time with fairies, guides, angels, nature spirits etc. They’re on a spiritual path of discovery, just like me. They are grounded, real, intelligent and creative people. Then there are people I have yet to meet, who might be led to my blog (welcome!). I’m totally cool for these two groups of people to know about me.
But then there are my friends and family from various parts of my world who i haven’t talked to much about my spirituality. My rational, logical, scientific, atheist, agnostic, religious, professional colleagues, gorgeous friends who i haven’t talked to about this stuff. (Although I’m not sure how many will be suprised by this!)
Well I’ve put it out there haven’t I? Talk about feeling like i’m running (i’d prefer horse riding) naked through the main street. It hit me and I freaked out. I wasn’t going to get any sleep.
I wandered outside, barefoot under the almost full moon. I stood there bathing in moonlight. Drawing down the beautiful light from the moon and visualising my energy connecting and grounding into the earth. All the fear, all the panic, all the negativity draining away. Thank you Gaia! I know this body that i travel around in comes from her and will go back to her, so she always knows how to restore it to calm and balance. I just need to make contact with her, (physically touching her is stronger), ask her, reach for her calm and thank her. The calm was almost instant.
What came to me, is that It is my obligation to be authentically me and for you being authentically you! The universe needs our authentic wholeness.
I wandered back inside and had a very deep sleep.
Image from www.sparkpeople.com
May you know your truth and it always be respected!
Much love and blessings
Sarah
PS Back to screaming, which i personally love. I live half way down a valley and we regularly have flocks of wild cockatoos screaming up and down the valley in a joyous celebration of life. Cockatoos are beautiful, fairly large birds with white and yellow feathers. They are sometimes kept as domestic pets and can be trained to talk and say various words.
Image from www.allposters.com.au
There was a story on the news a few years back, about a domestic cockatoo, who had been taught to swear. It escaped, joined a wild flock and trained them to do the same. Unfortunately they roosted right next to a primary school. Letters were sent home to parents to warn them, so they could take another route home with their children if they wished to avoid them. Crazy old world huh? Must be true, i read it on the news!! :o)
Here’s a fab blog by my shamanic friend Tracy, she describes this process of following the signs from the universe: Do you follow the breadcrumbs?